WHO KNEW?

When Julia, my cousin whom I’ve not had the pleasure of meeting, wrote: Yiddishe Shteitele, A Yiddish songbook with scores and lyrics, written in Russian and Yiddish, she would not have expected me, her cousin living in the states, to promote her work. A musicologist who studied in Kursk, Russia, and now resides in Be’er-Sheva, Israel, Julia compiled 19 songs of Jewish life in the shtetl.

Julia Temnogorod and I grew up living in parallel universes. Her great-grandmother Etl and my grandmother Sarah were sisters. Furthermore, her husband’s great-grandfather was the older brother of Etl and Sarah, Yellik. They’re all Temnogorods. Wow! We’re unquestionably related. Temnogorod, meaning “dark city,” is a rare family name, which my cousin Yuriy and his uncle, descendants of Yellik, researched before leaving Ukraine. At that time, they found no others with that name outside our family unit.

Cousins who have immigrated from Ukraine and grew up knowing Julia and her family have told me what a talented musician our cousin is, but I had no connection. We speak different languages, live across continents, and have not communicated.

Throughout the decades of her long life, Julia’s grandmother, Masha, maintained a correspondence with her aunt, my grandmother, then with my Aunt Fannie, and finally, with me. The eldest person to survive in our family, Masha, my father’s first cousin, lived to be 95. I’m so glad we kept the connection.

The only “personal” contact we’ve enjoyed with Julia’s family is when her aunt, Faina, her father’s sister, came to the United States in 2003 to celebrate our daughter Rina’s bat mitzvah. That connection continued when Rina stayed with Faina during a Birth Right trip to Israel in 2011. In Israel, Rina met Julia and more members of our large family.

During her extended stay in Israel, Rina met Julia’s sister Lilia, an artist and illustrator whose career I’ve watched blossom on social media. The illustrations by Lilia in her sister’s book complement the prose.

Aside from being Julia and Lilia’s aunt, their father’s sister, Faina, Masha’s daughter, is Lilia’s mother-in-law. Yes, as I’ve posted before, cousins marrying cousins was prevalent in our family from way back. My grandparents were first cousins before marriage.

On the other side of the world, aside from being the keeper of our family tree, I’ve written a book, which includes parts of the chapters of the memoir of Julia and Lilia’s father, Shimon. My cousin Harry translated the work by Shimon so that I could compare notes. With the passing of dear Cousins Shimon and Harry, my records are more important than ever.

We all have a story to tell. In our case, cousins are helping cousins from around the world. It’s what family is all about.

Although most of the book is upbeat, I could not help posting this page of illustrations by Lilia Goyzman