TRADE-OFFS IN LIFE — Sharon Mark Cohen

Well into her 97th year at the time of her demise (3-9-1915 — 12-28-2012), my mother lived to a riper old age than Queen Elizabeth II. Queen of the United Kingdom since 1952 at age 25, Elizabeth, the mother of four, lived, well...royally, until age 96 (4-21-1926 — 9-8-2022).

On the other hand, my mother, a homemaker extraordinaire, married at age 25. She and Queen Elizabeth each had three sons and one daughter. The Queen was 25 when she ascended to the throne and began her long reign. My mother and Queen Elizabeth II lived across an ocean, and their styles were notably oceans apart.

While my mother was a fan and often spoke of the Queen’s stateliness, she could not have assumed her role. Why not, you ask? Oddly, my mother never liked donning jewelry, while jewels are a “crowning” piece of a royal position.

Throughout her long years on the throne, the Queen was busy attending charity functions and traveling and was used to being served. Au contraire, my mother was used to serving. She was home 24/7 caring for her family’s every need. She didn’t drive and did not have a chauffeur. She often rehashed that she polished our shoes and washed the laces when my brothers and I were asleep. My memories are of my mother regularly hosting friends and relatives and always being praised for her cooking and baking prowess.

After our mother’s passing, my eldest brother did not become King, and the rest of us were not standing in line waiting for our turn to be greeted with a bow or a curtsy. Neither were we involved in scandalous affairs as were members of the quartet of children and extended family of Her Majesty.

As the crowds queued at Buckingham Palace for a 20-second glimpse of the Queen’s coffin three months ago, I could only think of my mother, who has been gone a decade this week. I can picture my dear mother sitting in her wheelchair at the kitchen table in, of all places, the City of Elizabeth (New Jersey). Attentively, she would be captivated by viewing the television screen. Last September, she would have watched as each mourner entered the room, just as she “attended” all the royal celebrations over the years of Queen Elizabeth II’s dynasty.

Looking back, my mother and the Queen of England were two lovely women who lived an ocean and worlds apart. They simply had different lots in life.